The Holy Empire of New New New Alabama is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by William Williams with an iron fist, and renowned for its ban on automobiles, digital currency, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 6.133 billion New New New Alabamans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Healthcare, and Industry are also considered important, while Social Policy is ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New New New Montgomery. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 76.7%.

The frighteningly efficient New New New Alabaman economy, worth a remarkable 1,177 trillion Stepsisters a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Uranium Mining. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 191,924 Stepsisters, with the richest citizens earning 7.9 times as much as the poorest.

Construction of the Really Big Hadron Collider is underway, the dish 'poisson avec poison' is only available on the black market, the request to "give us our daily bread" can only be fulfilled six days out of seven, and common misteaks slip threw as the Issues Editing Team adds issues by the hundread (New New New Alabama has found 3 easter eggs). Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. New New New Alabama's national animal is the Fried Chicken, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Jesus.

New New New Alabama is ranked 273,496^th in the world and 6,075^th in The North Pacific for Most Cultured, scoring 55 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.